literally had 100 drinks last night.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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