It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
