His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
