But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
