But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize
