so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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