just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
