Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize