I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
