P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
