taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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