I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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