Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Do vagina's smell?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
