ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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