so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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