the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Ketchup is God's man juice
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
