OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
