She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
we're making bets on your personal life
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
