Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
