You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
