you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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