no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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