he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize