I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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