I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I smell like Dick and happiness
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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