thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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