It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
