I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
