Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry cdurand030 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.

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(516): View more from New York

i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD

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(810): View more from Michigan

I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.

(732): View more from New Jersey

you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.

(732): View more from New Jersey

IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.

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(830): View more from Texas

I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts

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(506): View more from New Brunswick

ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...

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