I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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