Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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