Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I wish you could order shots online.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
