i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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