DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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