this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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