So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
