So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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