spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize