She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize