he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
