Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
