Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
