My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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