His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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