chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
