Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
