My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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