You're completely useless in the revolution.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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