as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
My Sexting was not on an AP level
That's how pantless uber rides happen
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
