I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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