so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
